Dilldo

Alphabet Survey meme thing...

A
- Available: Nope
- Age: 20(21 in 11 days!)
- Annoyances: Open mouth gum chewers
- Afternoons or mornings: Afternoon cause that's when I wake up
B
- Best Friend: Elizabeth and Nappi
- Beer: PBR please
- Birthday: Nov. 30th
- Best month: May I don't know why but I thought May
- Best day:Wednesday(comics) and Saturday

C
- Crush: Indeed
- Candy: CRUNCH BARS
- Colour: Red
- Chocolate or Vanilla: Always Chocolate
- Criminal Record: none

D
- Day or Night: Night
- Dream Vehicle: VW Bus
- Dream: Work with Comics

E
- Easiest Person To Talk To: A stranger
- Eggs: Sunny Sidue up
- End of the line: Blows
F
- First Crush: Caitlin Saner
- Fuck vs Feck: Fuckin....
- Fave piece of clothing: T-Shirt
- Fave song atm: San. Fransisco Dreaming
- Future: Really Hard to tell
G
- Gummy Bears or Gummy Worms: Da Bears
- Giver or Taker: Taker. I'm not good at giving things
- Greatest moment in life: 789 Gathering
- Gold or Silver: Gold

H
- Hair: Mullet (atm)
- Happy: Yeah
- Hat: Lately Yes
- Hugs: I'm down

I
- Ice Cream: Mint Chocolate Chip
- Instrument: Tap Shoes
- Is there anything you would tell yourself 3 years ago: Awkward month will go away and it will get a lot better
- Invisible for a Day: Totes
J
- Jewellry : Necklace my father gave me
- Job: Campus Rep...not really though
- Jeans: All I wear

K
- Kids: I like to think so
- King for the day: National Superman Day
L
- Lie ins: Never done it
- Longest Car Ride: 12 hours straight
- Life: I'm in it

M
- Milk Flavor: Milk
- Music: What's on?
N
- Number Of Siblings: 3
- Number : 565
- Note to self: You hotty

O
- One Wish: To fall in a vat of chemical waste and gain special abilities
- One song: Billy Jean
- One love: TimTams
P
- Part Of Your Personality That You Like: Taking to people
- Physical Feature on yourself you like: My butt
- Physical Feature on opposite sex you like: Their Butt
Q
- Quick or Slow: Oh baby?
- Queen for the day: Call the Gays!
R
Reason 2 Smile: FaceFace
Reason 2 Cry: End of where the Red Fern Grows
Rolos vs Refreshers: Rolos

S
Song You Last Heard: Matisyahu King with out a crown
Song You Are Hearing: Jimmy Two Shoes music

T
- Tattoo: Kryptonian Letters
- Time For Bed: Sleep? What's that?
- Time of Birth: 2 or 3 am
- Treat: TimTam Slam

U
- Useless: Eyebrow
- Unusual: Me
- Umbrella or hood: Hood

V
- Vegetable You Hate: Okra
- Vegetable You Love: Tomatoes
- Vertigo: Not a good song

W
- Worst Habits: Not planing things
- Worst Day: To long to list
- Worst Person: Hitler?
- Worst thing you own: Double Ended Dill
- Why?: Why not?
X
- X-Rays: They are cool to look at
- Xylophone: Only word I can think of that starts with X
Y
- Year It Is Now: 2009
- Yellow: Rangers was a Guy in Japan
Z
- Zoo Animal: Lion
- Zodiac Sign: Sagittarius

Naw

After posting the prank on Times Square I would like to say that I have been proven wrong. I am not as crazy big as I thought I was going to be.

Here I am again

I think that only one person out of anyone who reads this blog will get it. I'm not even sure what I'm about to write or why. It is currently 5:40 in the am and I Sidney Bernard Raskind am about to cry. I know why but I can't admit it even to myself.

Things that I am scared of:

1) not knowing what or who I am.
2) looking back on my life and seeing all the mistakes I have made and not being able to fix them at all.
3) Ending up like my father, alone with a family that dislikes him and bridges burned to all hell.
4) That high school was the prime time of my life

I just looked back on my past and started to cry. Only a little bit. Now I am done.

It must be when it gets so early in the morning without sleep that I get like this. Also when I make contact with something that I haven't thought about in a really long time. Completely tried to forget even. Blocked off networking sites to make my life easier.

I fucking hate when i get like this. The sun is rising and it's a new day. I just remembered all the things that are good in my life now.

I'm so fucking bi-polar sometimes it's ridiculous. Is there a pill for that?

P.S. I'm still wearing all my clothes from yesterday. Fully. Why don't i put on PJs when I get home? Why don't I get comfortable? I don't get it as much as Kristen doesn't. Am I odd?

Next time you can, crap with the door open

I tend to write the blogs before the title. I think that is a good way of doing it. I just thought you should know.

I have just spent the last 30 minutes or so reading Nappi's blog and then Kristen's. Two important people in my life right now. Both people that I care about and one of which is on my phone as the back round. (not Nappi, sorry man I love ya but that would be to gay) Moving on!

What are you moving on from though?
I don't know. Do you?
No, that's why I asked you cause you were the one that said it.
Ah, well...ok then.
So you really don't know what else there is do you?
...No, sorry.
Whatever, it's your blog.
Well thanks!
Anytime, btw Billy Mays died.
What!?!
Yeah I know.
I never did use oxy-clean. Well I'm sure the 5 people that had a fetish for him will miss him. His family too.

Has everyone here seen "Office Space"? If not then i think you are missing something from your life. Yesterday I laid in what is my bed(the couch) all day. Really. I didn't leave my apartment and I slept for a lot of the day. Not unlike the main character from that great movie. Well the difference is that I have felt like I have done nothing BUT that for a long time now. I know others that have done the same. It's not hard but it's not fullfilling either. I'm a bum with a roof over my heard and some food.

That was such a pointless blog post. God I hate that.

Costume change

For anyone that wanted to know, I'm wearing an assortment of cloths that I haven't worn since high school. Red freshman year track shirt with cargo shorts and my XC shoes from senior year. Now this might not be important, but to me it is and here is why:

1) I remember the way I was in high school and looked at myself with a distaste for my hair. I didn't like the hair cause it didn't look good with what I'm wearing. I looked better with shorter hair then. With what I wear and look like now, I know that myself then would have thought differently from myself now. It's a weird feeling to know that you of the past might not like you if you knew you now. Very SLC Punk.

2) I was told that I looked like i was in costume by a college counselor and my favorite English teacher when I visited after the semester was over. Now I know why. What I'm wearing now is a costume in itself. It sets the tone for a different person. The outfit I'm wearing puts me in the likes of runners and people like my brother. So I can see why the outfit I wore to that visit might confuse a lot of people. My costume then was a lot different from what I look like now.

Those are the only reasons I can think of right now. That's why it is important to me. I just realized a few things when I looked in the mirror and had to write it.

Crotch Head WOLVERIENES!!!

After reading my good friends blog I was inspired to write. I'm not sure what about though.

I just got it. Time and how quickly it passes me by. I woke up today with no idea of when or how i fell asleep. I was woken up by my alarm clock and today was the first time I actually got up to turn it off. I didn't go back to sleep and usually I sleep for two more hours.

Over the past month I have been to NY and back I have been back to Vienna and I have been all around Richmond. I do that last one on a day to day though so it's not that big of a deal. I have smoked a lot of weed and I have stopped smoking a lot of weed. That isn't the greatest auto-biography I know but in the words of Nappi, "you can go to hell."

So why did i tell you all that? Well just because it has been a month! What?! I don't know how time does it but it passes by real quick sometimes. Just a year ago I was in Vienna starting my job at AMC and in a relationship that was for lack of a better term, doomed.

Where did that year fucking go? That's what I want to know.

Just recently i have noticed this time passing by thing. It freaks me out. It freaks me out so much that when i look at the clock I see it as a later time because I know that it is going to be later before I know it. I have no way of stopping it. One thing that I have realized though, days come and go faster then I used to think. It's insane.

On another note, I played in the rain yesterday. I had a lot of fun. I was with four people and they all thought i was crazy. I think secretly though, they wanted to play. It was pouring down with lighting and everything. Like I said, good times.

Time passes by to quick for you not to do that kind of thing. I'm 20 years old with a life ahead of me but I still feel like I have to play and do stupid things because I'm going to be a whole lot older soon. It's the way I see it. It freaks me out.

I wanted to play so I did. Who wants to join me?

Time

Time to get out of here.
Time to let everything matter.
Time to stop being this way.
Time to take action.
Time to show people that I can.
Time to show myself I can.
Time to stop living in a daze.
Time to be more.
Time to...do the hustle.
Time to boogie.
Time to not have excuses.

Yeah, it's time.

Emerson would be proud

For real though, when was the last time that you looked to the Sunrise and just took in the beauty of it?

I am doing that now. I didn't go to sleep last night. Or rather tonight.

Last night I went to hang out with some frisbee people, we had a few drinks and had a good time. I left the place around 1 or so. I called Kristen on the way home and then I talked to her for the rest of the night until now. Now being the relative time when she was called into work.

Yeah, we both stayed up all night talking and now she has an 8 hour work day ahead of her. Fucking bad ass. Nappi I know you are going to read this; I think it's bad ass what you do too but most people, including Kristen, don't get 9 hours of sleep in 9 days. haha But really, I love ya Nappi.

I'm kinda feel asleep right now. Kinda.

Whatever. I had a good night.

It was great to talk to her for that long. It really was.

A nap for two hours? I think so.

By that I mean 9 hours. No, I can't do that. I'm not going to waste my fucking day. I'm sick of this shit.

Ok, I'm leaving now.

I like her

It's funny thinking like this.

Erm, yeah.

I don't really know what else to say.

Spending money I don't have. I really don't have it. I seem not to care though.

Funny how that works out.

Ummmmm, this is why:


Yeah, I like it. Don't care weather you do or not.

Who am I?

I am in the RVA this summer. Well ok then, what else is new? That's about it.

Here is something that is new; I'm a hippy? What? No you're not. Ok so back story; I'm in NY visiting Kristen when we decide to go to the park and just play on the play ground and end up laying in the field while the rain falls, it was good times. Then this group of kids walks up and one chick looks at us and says "Wait, are you guys hippies?! That is so cool!" Our response was, "Er, no, we are just here, laying in the field...while the rain falls on us."

I guess if you want to be a hippy then you are one. I don't see myself as one. There is that. I don't really know what else there is to it. Moving on.

I went to NY. It was awesome. I really liked it up there.

So I have a realationship with a girl that I met over the internet. Sue me.

I think i have to find a job here over the summer. By think i mean I do.

Nappi is 21? WHAT!? I remember when we used to talk about being this old. Now he is in the Army and I'm here in Richmond. I would have loved to celebrate with him. It's ok though, he is going to protect my country. What a fag.

God bless you man.

Death is to much for me

And that Is why I have to go to a Rabi and talk to said religious figure about the Old Testament.

Back Story: Yesterday I was reading the Old Testament in preparation for my test on the subject later in the day. As I read over these stories I found that most if not all of the Celebrations in my faith have to do with Death.

Example 1): Passover, celebrating the "Passing-Over" of the plague that killed all the first born in Egypt. All those babies and children died and then the Jews were released, thus the celebrations. But there is still so much death that goes with it. Also wth this story I was really pissed to find out that it wasn't the Pharoe who wanted to keep all the jews in Egypt but it was God who influenced the Pharoe to KEEP the Jews in Egypt so that God could show off his wrath and prove that the all Mighty was infact the All MIGHTY. GREAT!!! So now, instead of me thinking that it was the Pharoe who was being a shit, I think that God is being the harsh one for doing all these things to Egypt.

Example 2): Purim, Some of you may not know about this one and that is ok. This, from what I knew, is the celebration of Hamen not getting to kill all the Jews thanks to Esther. Esther is a BA don't get me wrong, but do you want to know what happened to Hamen and his 7 children? They were all hanged in front of an entire kingdom and left there for passer bys to see. WTF?!?! I'm sorry but that's not my cup of tea.

Example 3): The book of Job, Now this book is a testament to how faith can over come anything put in the way of a person. The endresult of the book being a good one yes, but the beggining being horrid. From my understanding this book was infact God tormenting Job and seeing if Job would still have faith, I get that. What I ended up reading was Different.

God sees Satan walking around earth and asks Satan, for lack of a better term, "Sup? What are you up to?" and Satan replies, "Chillan, walking around earth seeing whats up with the mortals." God replies, "Cool Cool. Hey listen do you see that mortal Job over there?" Satan, "Oh hell yeah. Not a bad guy that Job." God, "Yeah he is real great, one of my most loyal followers. He has this great family and a great farm going for him. But listen Satan, Do you want to mess with him?" Satan surprised answers, "Well sure God, I'll help you out with that!!" God answers calmly in his all mighty coolness "Cool Cool. Lets kill his children, all of them and his wife then lets kill all his live stock and see if he still has faith in me." Satan, "God you're the coolest God ever!"

Now let me get this straight, God teamed up with THE DEVIL to fuck around with Job?? Oh come on. That has to be the complete opposite of what I thought the G-man was about. Really though. In the end of a 42 chapter book and a very long conversation in prose, Job ends up keeping his faith and is rewarded by God with new kids a new wife and new cattle. Whatever, it's still fucked up that all that stuff had to happen to him. More over the whole team up with God and SATAN!!! That is was pissed me off the most.

Well I hope that you all enjoyed this post. I'm going to talk to a Rabi.

My brain

Could I ask you a question?
Sure, what is it?
Well ok, how did you wake up this morning?
Well I woke up at 10am, then I moved from my bed to my couch, laid there for an hour, and then moved back to my bed fro 2 hours.
Why did you just lay around?
I wasn't feeling well.
Oh, well I'm sorry about that.
It's fine. It was weird though, I haven't felt like that in a while. It wasn't that bad, it was just interesting to feel...not important.
Not important? What do you mean by that?
Well, you know when you wake up in the morning and you feel like you have something to do that day?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah. Well this morning I woke up and felt like there was no point in leaving my bed, or rather the laying down position. Almost as if I didn't have anything important to do that would require me to get out of bed.
Don't you have stuff to do though? Finals are this week and next, I'm sure you do.
Oh, I do, don't get me wrong, I have shit to do, it's just I felt like I didn't. It was freaky.
I think you used to many commas by the way. That is a lot of commas.
Well thank you for that.
Anytime. So how did you get out of this feeling?
Well I took a shower and left my place. I did things that I had to do. That's really it. When I feel like that it's a catch 22. I don't want to get up and do anything, but when I do stuff I feel better. If I stay in Bed I feel worse. It blows.
Are you ok now?
Yeah, I guess. I still kinda feel the same though. I don't like it. I don't like it one bit.
Well I'm sorry to hear that.
I'll be fine. I'm just being stupid right now.

Metal in my head

Over the past few days I have written here a lot more then I have been in the past few months. I'm not sure if that is a good or bad thing. I tend to look at it as a good thing.

Yesterday I went to a tattoo parlor and had my eyebrow pierced. Now some of you might ask me why I did it. I suppose everything needs a reason and there is one for this too. Do you really want the full explanation though? I mean, I can give it to you in a sentence. Ready? I was sick of trying to look like other people and I wanted something new. There, I like it.

It didn't hurt at all and I was really happy with the outcome. For one thing i was excited to show a friend in particular. That friend liked it by the way and that made me feel better about my decision.

Yes I chose to do it on my own and prove that I was a grown up, but we all need some validation. Hahaha It's funny how I wanted to be separate and yet i still wanted a little appeal from others.

I got home and help a surprise party for a friend. I was ready to take it from all sides. I knew that I was going to be made fun of and hassled about it. I was ready. I think I handled it well. I don't think they thought I was going to actually do it either. I did want some positive comments though. I didn't really get any from my friends here.

When I talked to that friend though it made it ok. She liked it. And then I tweeted it and people on twitter liked it. One thing that I have come to realize is how there are people out there that will like something just like you like it. I really like that about all the social networking I do. Helps me get through the shit of my "IRL" friends. Sometimes the interscapes seems more real to me then real life. If I could have all my internet friend here with me I'm sure that it would be a lot of fun.

Some people say that people that you meet online aren't real, but I tell them to fuck off. The people that I meet online are very real and very real friends.

I thank them for that.

Anyway, I got a piercing and I like it. Now for the family attacks. I'm not to excited about that.

YouTube, Comics, Ultimate

Who should I make this out to? I'm not sure if I should write it to Z or to R. Well if I write it to Z it will be about something different then if I write it to R.
Hm, well that is a problem. I mean you could write it to both I suppose.
Half to Z and the other to R? No, I think that Z is a topic that I want to hit on more then the topic with R.
Well get on with it then. I'm sure everyone is waiting.
Ok, thanks.

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So last night I had a talk with you about how I have changed. How I am different and you don't think that we have anything in common anymore. How when we were dating you felt like all we talked about was what I was interested in. I can see how that would be a problem.

We ended the conversation and I wasn't that upset about it. You know what we talked about and so do I so there is no point going over it again.

I called you again today because it was on my mind last night and I had to ask you a question. We talked again, I asked what I needed to, got the response and that was that.

So I guess that we can't be friends. In all honesty I am not that upset. Not in the slightest. Like you said we have both been doing our own thing and it seems to be working out for the both of us.

It's weird to think that we had all that time together just to realize that we actually don't have that much in common. I mean it has been 6 months since everything went down and I'm not surprised to find out all this stuff.

I like what I like now. I am what I am now. I'm making friends that are interested in those kind of things. People that like me for what I'm interested in. I'm glad you are doing the same.

I can finally look at pictures of us and see the good times we had. Kinda. *smirk*

So if you don't think that we can be friends that's cool. I think we can still be the same as what we are now. I like that. Even though it doesn't really entail that much contact. Whatever it is now is what it's going to stay for a while. I think.

There really isn't more to say. Yeah...I'm done.

Dream World while Awake

You know in the Movies when people talk about being in dream world and the real world at the same time?

That is where I am right now. That is what I feel like. After staying awake more then 24 hours and getting one hour of sleep, I don't know what plane of existence I'm on.

You ever feel like that? I mean wow. This is freaky. It's almost as if I'm morning drunk and at the tail end of being high at the same time. Add sleep deprivation and body exhaustion and you have me.

While riding my bike I realized that I could barley pay attention to my surroundings and I don't have good motor skills. FREAKY!!!

I hope you all enjoyed my story. I was reading over it and wanted to delete though whole thing. At the same time though, I thought that it was cool that you could see what I was thinking when I wrote a sentence. I'm lame aren't I? I bet anyone that read the whole thing got to the end and thought, "Dear God that was long and drawn out and I don't really get it at all. Why would a flower talk? Does Sid know anything about finding himself?" The last bit I do. The "Rose" was the flower that I thought of when I wrote the story in 5th grade.

I think that is the first time I have mentioned that story since I was that age. Wow.

I'm going to dream world again. Well actually I'm staying awake, but in my mind it's dream world.

A story I remembered

Once upon a time there was a boy. This boy loved exploring new things. He loved to go around his town with friends and find new ways home, new ways around town, and new things that he had never before noticed in the town.

One day while he was out and about on a hot summers day he found a very large hole in the ground. He looked into this hole and was scared. Where did this hole come from? He was 12 years old, he knew everything there was to know about this town. He had spent countless days exploring, and yet he had no idea where this hole came from. It seemed to be and endless pit with no end in sight.

The first thing he did was run to his friend and tell him about this hole. They both ran outside and to this pit the boy had found. It was an amazing sight for both of them. It had dirt all around the outside and a what seemed to be a cave mouth on the inside. While the boys were exploring they noticed that there was a dirt ramp leading down to the came mouth. Being the boys they were, they went down that ramp and went into the cave.

Now they boys were always ready for any type of adventure so of course they had flashlights. Flashlights shining bright they did what they knew best and explored. The boys had never seen anything like this. The walls where shining and there seemed to be needles hanging from the ceiling. The trail they walked was littered pebbles and and needles from the floor just like the ceiling ones.

After an eternity they boys saw no more light from the outside and realized that they didn't know the way out. The boys became scared but remembered that they were adventurers and must not show fear. The boys turned around and headed to what they thought was the way out. They came to a for in the cave they hadn't noticed before and didn't know what to do. After a debate and a heated game of Rock Paper Scissors they chose to go left. Continuing on this path for a while they began to see what was a glimmer of light.

The boys began to run with excitement and just as they were about to get to the end, there was a rumble. Now even though the boys were fearless, they were scared. The cave was rumbling and the ground was shaking madly. The boys were frozen for a moment and then out of no where ran faster then they ever had before. With the cave still rumbling the ceiling began to fall. The friend jumped out of the the cave just in time to avoid being caved in. Our discoverer of the hole how ever was not as lucky.

The boys yelled at each other and the friend said he would go get help. Our brave explorer was trapped in this cave while he waited for help. He kept the light on as long as he could. The cave was dark and scary. There were sounds coming from the cave that he hadn't noticed while walking around. The light was flickering on and off and they boy became more afraid. The light went out completely, the boy seemed to be with out hope. They boy began to cry and held himself in this scary place.

From just above him a voice was heard. A soothing voice that the boy had no reason to be afraid of. The voice asked "Hello there boy, are you ok?" They boy responded with a shallow "No, no, I'm scared." The voice replied with "Why are you scared? Is it because there is no longer any light?" The boy answered "Yes. How am I supposed to be ok when I don't know where I am and when I feel like no one will ever come to help me?" "Well," the voice said "I can help with that." There was a flash of light and the cave was all of a sudden shinning as bright as a summers day. The boy looked around for the body that went along with that voice. This person was no where to be found.

"Look up boy." The boy looked up but still saw no body. All he saw was a flower. A rose to be exact. "Hello boy." The boy was confused and didn't know how to respond. How was the flower talking? Where did that light come from? Why was he not scared of this talking plant? All questions that he didn't know the answer to. "You are a talking rose?" the boy asked. "Yes, indeed I am." the rose answered softly. "Well where did this light come from" egerly asked the boy. "The light came from the cave of course. It is what happens when there is no outside light coming in." answered the flower. "Oh, that makes sense." said the boy.

"You should wake up though boy. Your friend is back and the cave is open."
"What? I thought that I was awake?"
"You are awake. You aren't scared anymore."
"When did that happen?"
"Just now. When you found out that there was light inside of you instead of looking around for other sources."
"I thought that was you who made the light?"
"No, it was you. You being able to look to yourself rather then to others."
"Is that a good thing?"
"It is a good thing indeed."
"Well thank you."
"For what?"
"Talking to me while I was scared I guess. I'm not sure."
"Goodbye boy."
"Goodbye rose."

The boy was waken up by his friend and his father. The boy tried to tell the story, but no one would listen to him. The boy went on with his summer and had many more adventures, but he always remembered that flower. The rose that helped him find that light he needed so much when he was scared.

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I wrote that when was in 5th grade I think. I added some stuff but it's just a better version I guess. Thanks for reading it.

Inspired

I'm inspired to write.

So I'm writing. What is it that I'm inspired about?

There really isn't anything that I want to talk about.

I shaved my face but that was a while ago.

Well I'm sorry that it was lame.

Well then, ok...have a good day.

Holy Crap

The title says it all.

How do you go about an internet crush?

Do they go anywhere?

I don't think so.

I have two test tomorrow.

I'm happy I spelled tomorrow right.

I still haven't shaved my face.

New Post

That title is so original.

So I haven't shaved in a long time and I need a hair cut. Wow, what is wrong with me? I kinda want to go to Vienna and show my mom then get rid of it all. I think that she would get a kick out of it.

I had a dream last night and the night before about having to kill Zombies. I"m reading World War Z so I think it's starting to have an effect on me.

Hm.

I went to Tech this past weekend and had a good time. It was a complete 180 from last time. I still don't know how people go to school there though. There was NOTHING to do there. Well at least I had a better time.

I got a B on my Physics test so that was sweet.

I guess that is it.

Like old times

I'm writing this to you. Good to talk to you again. When ever I come onto Blogger, which is rarely, i always venture to your blog first. You're the reason that I have one of these things in the first place. For some reason i seem to get upset all the time when I read your blog and I think it's cause I'm not in that life anymore and I sometime miss it. Whatever, we have been over this so many times it's stupid to even think about.

I guess I'm trying to say that I'm not upset anymore. Not as much as I was.

I'm glad you are happy.

Talk to you later.

Look at me

It's funny the things that you think of when you see people. Just the most random things that pop into your head.

I wonder what people think of when they see me on the streets or randomly on facebook?

I want to go back to Georgia.

Biscuit Villians

I feel so happy sometimes. Tonight and this past week has been like that. I don't know, i'm with good people. Thanks Biscuits.

Blogging late at night

I'm blogging. I'm awake. I have long hair. I like to read comics. I'm a geek/nerd. I don't know the definition or difference between those words. I think that they are synonyms. I'm a vlogger. I like college. I like not living at home is more like it. I have a boxed happy meal on my desk. Am I weird for keeping the box? "Watch the Sunrise" just came up on my iTunes. I was thinking about doing that tonight. iTunes knows things, and it's freaky. I posted a new video up on my personal channel yesterday. I like it a lot.

Paragragh change. Well that was fun. I havn't talked to nappi in a long time. I feel like our conversations on the phone are better then any other way of comunication. I'm going to see Watchmen at midnight tomarrow. I'm excited...sorta. I'm not really excited about anything at the moment.

Spring break is next week. I just want to be in GA. I think that it is going to be fun. Ultimate and the beach with a buch of people that i really like and some that I don't like. Jeff C is one of the people i can't stand. Nappi, i don't like the kid. At all. Also, Evan, I can't take him either. it's bad because you were what kept that group together. I don't really see Evan though, but it is easier to get along with him when you are there.

I'm better at vlogging the blogging. I think.

biggity bye bye (the newest catch phrase)

I smell of old man

I posted two weeks ago. I'm losing my touch. I was never intense about the blogging thing. I'm also losing it on YouTube. I haven' posted on there in forever. I'm behind on my subscriptions. Maybe it's because I've been busy. I think that is why. Last week was one of the worst weeks I have had. It was great weather but my body decided not to like it at all. I was sick all week. It was horrible.

I went to practice last week and that made me feel great. I think it is the going outside part that helps. yesterday I was playing ultimate for 8 hours and it was fun. Until one game when I twisted my back in a bad kind of way and now it's hard to move around. God it sucks. I made a bad decision though. I played the last game for about an hour. I would say I played Savage(the whole game) but i let one point get away from me so technically I didn't. I was in the Zone. All I wanted to do was play the whole game. I was running so hard and doing my thing on the field. I was in a bad mood too. I kept getting called off the field and it made me mad. I'm not as good as other player I know that, but i don't know, i just want to play more so that I can get better.

So I played a lot. Then at the end of the game guess what? You got it, I was in more pain then I was when I started out. That deserves a Woot Woot. Now I'm wearing an Icy-Hot patch. It was scary not to move around as much.

I will start posting more.

Don't Judge

I have made great friends on the internet. So when people judge me for that I'm not sure how to take it.

I know that there are a lot of people out there, some of them I have made friends with, that are on the computer as much as me. Also these people know a lot of other people.

I'm happy to know so many people around the world.

Really all of the IRL friends I have know about my channel and SRP. It's great to be able to talk to them about it.

Just wanted to write something about it.

I feel like I llive alone

Not that is a bad thing. I bassically live alone though. Here I am in my apartment, my roommate isn't here and really I never expect him to be here. He is always at his girlfriends house. Always. I here that he might have broken up with her. I wouldn't mind. They have a really odd relationship and just fight all the time. Not my business though. He is grown up and can figure stuff out for himself.

This next paragraph is to the bloggers that I follow. I have been REALLY bad about reading them lately. I rarely get on here anymore. I have been cutting back on the Internet thing. A lot less time on the bloggersphere. Nappi I don't read yours anymore. I'm going to catch up tonight though. At least in the next few days i will do my best to sit down and catch up with you. Also when was the last time I talked to you?!?! Really man. WTF?!

So i'm not sure if I have mettioned going to the gym more and just being all around better to myself, but it is working out. I'm still going to yoga. I missed last Wednesday due to lack of sleep but it's ok cause I'll just go this week.

I saw Batman: The Dark Knight in HD tonight. Oh my God it was great. It really was.

My hair is so long. I really can't believe that it has grown out this much. Should I get it cut?

I haven't slept in my bed in a couple of weeks now. I don't think that is going to change tonight. I just have a har time sleeping in there. Well i haven't tried in a while so I'm not sure how i would know.

Nappi I'm calling you tomorrow.

Breath In and Out.

I woke up at 6:30am to go to a 7am yoga class. I actually got up and did it. I was impressed with myself. The waking up was the hardest part for me. It was 18 degrees outside when i left for the class. The class itself was held at the gym a few blocks away. To say the least it was still very cold walking the short distance.

I got in there and saw that people were already set up so i got a mat and sat down. I don't think i have been that relaxed in a long time. The start of the class was just relaxation. It was great.

Over the hour class we did many different exercises. They all in some way helped me relax. I think the key to it all was the breathing. I had to get some of it down before i could really feel the stretch take effect, but it was my first time doing it so it's ok.

At one point the sun was rising and you could see it through the windows. It was so nice to see that orange color. It made it that much more relaxing. I was just thinking, "That is beautiful, I'm up early enough to see the sun come up while I'm doing Yoga. Cool."

I'm really feeling more centered about a lot of stuff.

I can't wait till next Wednesday.

Fuck Knees

I saw something today that I didn't think I would ever see. I saw one of the happiest people I know cry. This is one of my closest friends and some one who has always helped me through the hardest times that I've had recently.

What do you do when some one that means so much to you breaks down like that? I had to be strong for that person. I had to be the one to help them through the tough time. I think I did a good job too. I hugged, I held and I comforted. (I don't know if that is a word)

It scared me to see that person like that. It was almost like seeing a parent break down for the first time. You don't know how to react, but you do the best you can.

The stories that you told were heart wrenching.

I hope that i have conveyed well enough how much it effected me to see you like that. Be strong man. I'm scared too.

I will help you through it all if i have to. I hope that you know that. you have helped me through so much and you are like family to me.

Title Unknown

So over the past few days all I have been is sick. It's nothing more then a cold. It was a bad one though. My body ached and my nose would not stop leaking. The only way I got to sleep was by taking medicine. If you know me well, you know that I hate taking medicine. Today wasn't that bad, so that is a plus.

I haven't been to shafer once yet. I decided not to get a meal plan this semester. Over the winter break and a few days before I left, I liked not having to go to shafer to eat. I liked having food in my own apartment. Over the month long break I didn't eat at shafer obviously. When I was in Florida I didn't go to the dinning hall at Elizabeths school. I cooked chicken pot pie and liked doing it. I liked having the left overs and I liked making something for myself. So this semester for the most part I'm not going to shafer. I'm going to be learning how to cook. I'll be making dinner, lunch and whatever else in my apartment. I think it's good. I think its better I learn how to cook anyway.

Over the week I have gone to the gym more. It's a good feeling. I want to start doing Yoga too. Even though it's a 7 in the morning I think it will help me relax. My schedual allows me a free afternoon on Fridays so that means i get to play Dogeball!!! I'm so excited for that. I just found out that it isn't called Dogeball though, it's called "Medicball". It's still the same though, so it's cool.

I've been thanking about sky diving in the past few days. My broher-in-law does it and seeing a video on let me in on how cool it would be.

Bullet Bill is the Man

Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays are my "busy" days. That is when I have most of my classes. Russian at 11, Math at 12, and Physics at 1. On Wednesdays I have a class at 7pm-9:40pm. Once a week. Tuesdays and Thursdays the only class I have is Russian. There is a HUGE perk to my Russian class. The building that it's in is literally behind my apartment building. I can see the building when I walk out the back door of the building.

When it comes to jobs though, that is a different story. I work 6 hours on Tuesdays and Thursdays after my one class. On Wednesdays I work 2-6. That is the front desk job at the SMC. There is no reason for me to be there until 6 on the days that I'm working but my boss said it was cool if I stayed an extra hour.

I finally mailed in all the paper work for my Campus Rep Job, so that's cool. I really hope I did it all the right way.

I don't think that I'm going to have my radio show anymore. I just don't think that Julian or my self will have the time this semester. I'm a part of the station so much already so I think it's ok if I don't have the show. I'm still going to buy the comics. I'm not sure about the show though.

Guy Richie is the man

I'm sitting in my apartment with the bros. We are playing DragonballZ Budokai Tenkaichi 3. I love this game. I guess I'm being anti social right now, but I'm not playing so it's ok.

Well John just showed up. Nate came with him. More bros have come.

I went to the gym yesterday. Man, I'm sore this morning. It was the first time I lifted in a long time. I liked it though. It felt good.

Classes start tomorrow. Since I messed up so much last semester I'm bassically retaking last semester. I have one new class and that is Introduction to the Old Testament. I have to go buy that book. I think I want to do it now.

P.S. Revolver is a good movie. Thanks to my older sister I have found good movies. Thanks Beth... :)

One carry on

I'm in the JAX airport right now. This is the first time I have ever traveled on a plane by myself. The security was insane but not as time consuming as I thought it was going to be. The last time I flew anywhere was five years ago I think. So to say the least the security has changed a bit. I had to take out my laptop and all electronic devices. All that jazz was intense to me.

Nappi let me in on some stuff that annoyed him when he is going through security, so i tried to remember that when I was going through.

Now I'm just waiting for my flight.

One thing I do like though, the accommodations for laptops and the free internet. It's nice.

I forgot my headphones though. They are in Richmond and it blows. I hope i get some shitty free ones on the flight to the ATL.

I'm going to film some and then read comics.

Despondent

I woke up about 15 minutes ago. I woke up to thoughts of Lisa. Every morning I wake up to thoughts of Lisa. I've been doing my best to respect her wishes. Yeah I texted her a few times, and I've called her to no avail. I left messages with the sense that she wasn't going to call me back. I try not to go to her facebook page or her blog. After doing something for two plus years though it's hard not to do those things. The internet makes this stuff harder I think.

Some people think that the internet isn't real life. I tend to think the opposite. I have made great friends on here and now I'm hanging out with them. All that not possible with out the internet. Social interactions happen through the internet now. That's just the way it is. Events are planed, full conversations are had that are brought up in conversation later face to face. Thoughts are published that are truly what that person is thinking. so to say that the internet isn't real life, to me, can't be true.

I wake up and think of how much I hurt this person that I love so much. I wake up and think of how much happiness we had. I wake up and think about how much happiness I still want to have. But you see that is the key problem is "I". Now I don't mean to be selfish about this relationship and I have explained that to Lisa many times over, but it is hard not to say "I" when it involves only two people. I'm sorry if I seem selfish.

Over the break I tried many times just to have what I thought was best. I would find out that I wasn't best at all. I tried to see The Curious Case of Benjamin Button three times and only just saw it when I got to Florida. The last time Lisa and I spoke was the second time I tried to see it. Now that I think about it the first and second time I tried to see it was with Lisa. Sorry if that was off topic but it was really annoying not to see that movie so many times.

She said that she need a true break. Time to just get everything straight. I'm holding on when I don't know if I should be. I've always been one to hold on though. Lisa knows that. One of those things that you learn about someone only through being around them a lot. Lisa and I always did things together. We were always the couple that made decisions about what we were going to do long term together.

So what now do you ask? I don't know. I really don't. We went through so much shit, that I guess I caused. Wow, that sucks to say.

For the next few days I'm here in Florida. I'm here to just relax and not think about anything. Even though I think about everything all the time.

To pass you need citrus fruit

This is starting out a short post. Maybe it will stay that way.

Right now I'm in Florida. Uhhh, Sid, when did you go to Florida? Well on Saturday. Ok, shy are you in Florida? Well Elizabeth was driving down and I went with her. Alright when are you going to Richmond? Friday afternoon is my plane and I get in that night. Oh alright.

Well how is it down there? It's nice. I really like the weather and the people. Not going to lie, if I could go here I would. I'm still in that honey moon effect though. I do love it though. I can see why people come here to die.

The coolest thing happened to me this week though. Oh yeah! What was that? I GOT TO MEET LIZZIE AND BRETT!!! It was so cool. I don't think that it could have been any cooler then the way it was. It wasn't awkward at all. It was so fucking cool to see them both in person. When you make a friend on the internet you get to know them so well. People are used to meeting and getting to know people like that in person not online. When you meet and get to know people on the web all you know is the internet people. When I actually met Lizzie and Brett it was almost surreal. I really couldn't believe that they were real people. But it was great. So great.

Check out my youtube page for a feel of where I'm staying.

I'm happy to be here with Elizabeth too. She is in class most of the week and busy with class. So not being rude.

WOOT WOOT!

Hello '09

Another year has gone by. When did that year happen is what I want to know? Really though. I can look at this past year and be happy with a lot of things that I did. I went to a four year college in less time then people thought I could, I set up my own radio show on comic books with a good friend, I made some really good friends, and I joined the Ultimate Team. I feel like that is the list of things I did this year. Well the things that I can remember off hand.

Now most of us all know that shit hit the fan in a real bad kind of way with my love life. If you don't know that...It happened. That, as of right now is all I can think about. It's all I wake up to every morning. I wake up and think "God your a shit head, hey but good job on being a shit. You are really good at it!" I can't think about anything else. I barely force myself to get out of bed in the morning. FUCK THAT! When I do get out though it's fine...ish.

The end of the year was not a good one. It really wasn't.

I hope you call me back.